Discernment Counseling
Are you and your partner stuck in emotional limbo—not sure whether to stay in the marriage or move toward separation?
Discernment Counseling offers a short-term, structured process to help couples pause, reflect, and decide—with honesty, integrity, and emotional clarity. It’s designed to support thoughtful decision-making before committing to divorce or full couples therapy.
Discernment Counseling
Find Clarity Before Commitment
Are you and your partner stuck in emotional limbo—not sure whether to stay in the marriage or move toward separation?
Discernment Counseling offers a short-term, structured process to help couples pause, reflect, and decide—with honesty, integrity, and emotional clarity. It’s designed to support thoughtful decision-making before committing to divorce or full couples therapy.
What Is Discernment Counseling?
Unlike traditional couples therapy, which focuses on fixing the relationship, discernment counseling helps partners decide whether to keep things the same, move toward separation, or commit to six months of focused relationship work.
In just 1 to 5 sessions, couples explore three possible paths:
1. Keep the marriage as it is
2. Move toward separation or divorce
3. Commit to six months of couples therapy with a clear intention to rebuild
This is not about pressure or persuasion—it’s about clarity.
What Is Discernment Counseling?
Unlike traditional couples therapy, which focuses on fixing the relationship, discernment counseling helps partners decide whether to keep things the same, move toward separation, or commit to six months of focused relationship work.
In just 1 to 5 sessions, couples explore three possible paths:
1. Keep the marriage as it is
2. Move toward separation or divorce
3. Commit to six months of couples therapy with a clear intention to rebuild
This is not about pressure or persuasion—it’s about clarity.
WHO IT'S FOR
Discernment counseling is ideal for mixed-agenda couples—when one partner is considering leaving and the other is hoping to repair the relationship.
It may be right for you if:
You’re thinking about divorce but feel uncertain
One partner feels checked out; the other wants to reconnect
You’re tired of unresolved conflict but unsure if things can change
You want a process that brings calm, structure, and direction
You don’t want to rush into a decision you might regret
Sessions are available in-person in the Milwaukee area and online statewide.
WHAT TO EXPECT
Each 90-minute session includes:
A brief joint conversation to set the session’s focus
Individual conversations with each partner to explore personal goals, concerns, and hopes
A closing conversation together to share reflections and assess next steps
The process typically takes between 2 to 5 sessions. Some couples find clarity after just one.
Whether you choose to stay together or part ways, the goal is the same: to help you move forward with confidence, peace, and mutual understanding.
WHO IT'S FOR
Discernment counseling is ideal for mixed-agenda couples—when one partner is considering leaving and the other is hoping to repair the relationship.
It may be right for you if:
You’re thinking about divorce but feel uncertain
One partner feels checked out; the other wants to reconnect
You’re tired of unresolved conflict but unsure if things can change
You want a process that brings calm, structure, and direction
You don’t want to rush into a decision you might regret
Sessions are available in-person in the Milwaukee area and online statewide.
WHAT TO EXPECT
Each 90-minute session includes:
A brief joint conversation to set the session’s focus
Individual conversations with each partner to explore personal goals, concerns, and hopes
A closing conversation together to share reflections and assess next steps
The process typically takes between 2 to 5 sessions. Some couples find clarity after just one.
Whether you choose to stay together or part ways, the goal is the same: to help you move forward with confidence, peace, and mutual understanding.
Why It Helps
Many couples enter this process feeling overwhelmed by indecision,
resentment, and emotional pain.
Discernment counseling provides:
A structured space to explore options without pressure
Clarity about whether the relationship can be repaired
Insight into what each partner has contributed to the current state
A more grounded emotional foundation for whatever comes next
A respectful, guided approach to separation if that is the chosen path
Even one session can provide immediate relief and a sense of direction.
About Your Therapist
With over 30 years of experience in couples and family work, I help partners navigate moments of deep uncertainty with care and clarity. I’m trained in Discernment Counseling, the Gottman Method, and Emotionally Focused Therapy, and I specialize in helping couples make informed, respectful decisions about the future of their relationship.
About Your Therapist
With over 30 years of experience in couples and family work, I help partners navigate moments of deep uncertainty with care and clarity. I’m trained in Discernment Counseling, the Gottman Method, and Emotionally Focused Therapy, and I specialize in helping couples make informed, respectful decisions about the future of their relationship.
Schedule a Free Consultation
If you’re feeling torn about the future of your relationship,
discernment counseling can help you make a decision you can live with
—and feel good about.
Schedule a free 45-minute consultation to explore if this process is right for you.
Offering sessions in person in Milwaukee and
virtually throughout Wisconsin.
Frequently Asked Questions
Answers to common inquiries below
How does this work?
This program is structured as a regular weekly video sessions with me, over a 90-day period.
What's covered?
There is so much I can cover with couples that this is a difficult question to answer. Generally speaking, we will focus on the relationship skills that are most important to foster early in the life of a couple building a family together; this includes managing differences of opinions in parenting, family organization, setting limits and holding boundaries, being assertive, offering and receiving emotional support, big picture planning, growing a family identity, working through conflicts with each other, maintaining affection and romance, standing up to pushy family members, and many more...
Who is this for and not for?
This is for couples who are in a committed monogamous relationship who have grown their family beyond yourselves, so you may have a newborn or you may have a three year old and still be struggling to work together. If you have to balance the identities of spouses AND coparents, this program will speak to your struggles.
What if I'm not sure?
Totally fine! That’s why we start with a free video consultation. Schedule the call, follow the steps, and together we will determine if this program is a good fit for your needs.
How often do we meet?
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What can I expect after the therapy?
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